Most often, we think of pirates as cruel, heartless and very very macho. But they were not all like that. Pirate Queen Emeraldas Texidor took to the seas and to piracy with her husband when the craft beer bar they owned on the Island of Menorca was wrecked for the 3rd time by British tourists demanding Fosters on all taps. Emeraldas' husband never adapted well to life on a pirate ship and soon died from an infected hemorrhoid. Now the Pirate Queen was also the Pirate Captain. Emeraldas committed her crew to only attack British cruise steamers, of which there were quite a few during the Victorian era. No weaponry was ever used during the attacks, only water cannons and very large deck mounted loudspeakers playing Wagner's The Song of the Nibelung on max and repeat. This made many of the tourists simply jump ship when her pink dreadnought approached at full speed. Emeraldas introduced a meat free day, fresh veggies with all meals and gluten free Pale Ale on her ship and her crew became known as unbeatable at the yearly Mediterranean pirate games. Respected and loved to the day she retired and beyond, Emeraldas invested all of her life savings in a nursing home for orphaned children on Inuit pirates on a remote island in the Outer Hebrides controlled by Scottish nationalists. There, on 22 Jan 1901, she quietly passed away while working on a manifesto for activist, female piratism.